Many men would agree that masturbation is just about the most fun a man can have by himself - but that’s not to say that masturbation can’t be shared with another. While the idea of masturbating in front of and/or in tandem with a partner may seem odd or uncomfortable to some men, it can actually be a very helpful way to communicate information about oneself sexually to another - and to also learn about that other person sexually at the same time. As long as he practices good penis care, there’s no physical reason a guy needs to be uncomfortable with this situation, although some may require a little "push" to get them over the hump emotionally.

How to start

Every couple is different, but unless their sexual play has already naturally involved masturbating in front of one another (perhaps as foreplay or post-play related to intercourse), bringing up the idea of mutual masturbation might be difficult. Once the subject has been broached, however, a couple should decide on how they want to approach this. Some things to consider might be the following:

- Do we want this to happen "on its own" or as part of a prelude to intercourse?

- Will we masturbate one after the other or at the same time?

- Shall we touch only ourselves or shall we be allowed to touch each other?

Possible approaches

There is no right or wrong way to go about this, but here are some possible approaches a couple may take to mutual masturbation.

- One watches, then explains. With this approach, one partner masturbates (as un-self-consciously as possible and as if they were alone) while the other observes. When the masturbator has finished, the observer details what they saw - what things they did that surprised them, ways they touched themselves that surprised them, how the masturbator’s reactions felt to the observer, et cetera. The masturbator can then respond, adding to what has been said or providing new information that the observer might have missed. And then, of course, the partners switch roles and do it again.

- Talk it out. Here, each partner masturbates at the same time, standing (or sitting or lying) a decent distance from each other so that they have a clear view of the other. While masturbating, each one talks about what they are doing, why they are doing it, how it feels, et cetera - although they try not to talk over each other, so that the other can hear and learn "in real time" what the other likes sexually.

- Lending a hand. One partner masturbates the other. The one being masturbated talks directly to the partner during this, letting them know when something feels good or when it does not feel right, what they can do to make it feel better, whether they should go faster, slower, deeper, et cetera. It’s especially good during this time to encourage the partner to touch erogenous zones other than those with which they may already be familiar.

- All together. Partners sit, stand, or lie face to face, so that they are as close as is possible. One partner masturbates themselves and is also masturbated at the same time by the partner, with each talking as they do. ("Does this feel better or this?" "Can you move your hand a little higher?") They then switch when the first partner feels completed.

There are practically limitless other variations a couple can employ: the key thing is that they communicate with the other what feels nice or doesn’t provide the desired feeling.

Mutual masturbation is an excellent way to communicate sexually, but a man will feel more at ease if his penis is in good health as well as in good hands. Regular use of a first-rate penis health oil (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which is clinically proven mild and safe for skin) can help. Look for an oil with both a high-end emollient (such as shea butter) and a natural hydrating agent (such as vitamin E) to keep penis skin looking and feeling smooth. In addition, an oil with vitamin C, a key component of collagen, a tissue in the body that gives skin its tone and elasticity, is also recommended.